We interrupt this blog for a detour into the land of bad parenting
Jun 25 2007
Looking at horse ads gives you a glimpse into another world…the world of backyard horsepeople with absolutely no f’ing common sense. Inevitably, they have reproduced and are now passing along their deep desire to win a Darwin Award to their offspring. (It is a real design flaw with human beings that people too stupid to have kids are also too stupid to master birth control.)
I have a gentle weanling too. I am proud of how quiet he is. But I’ll be damned if I’m going to sit on the ground and snuggle with him like a kitten. Much less barefoot. He’s still a horse. If he sees a horse-eating groundhog or someone drives by with a trailer with flapping plastic, those two morons are going to have baby-sized hoofprints on their unprotected heads. And she’s got him turned out in an all-nylon halter. Man, she’s like the poster child for Gypsy Vanner Breeders, and that’s not a compliment.
Oh for fuck’s sake. I’m not a parent and I know this is negligent. What is that, a two year old? Maybe? Standing on a pony with no helmet. Look, Ma, no hands! Hope y’all have got a cell phone handy for that inevitable 911 call when Buster the farm dog blasts forth from behind the shed chasing a chicken and Pony goes batshit.
You know, when I do stupid things, and someone takes a picture, I endeavor to keep those pictures in my private collection (like the time we were all doing jello shots at a political convention in D.C…ok enough about that). But no, Mother of the Year here has no shame. This picture is up there on DreamHorse for all to see. *shakes head*
Cute pony. MORONS for owners.
OK, mom? I see you are right there on your own horse. Do you think you might want to do something about the fact that the pony’s reins are actually dragging on the ground by his feet? Maybe you’d like to do something about that before he steps on them, cranks the crap out of his mouth with that long-shank child-inappropriate bit you have on there, and flips himself over backwards with your helmetless child on him?
C’mon. You don’t get to claim ignorance. You obviously ride yourself. Is lopping off the ends of the too-long reins really all that complicated a task for you? Or putting a helmet on your very small child?
And I thought the fugly horses were giving me a headache…
10 comments to “We interrupt this blog for a detour into the land of bad parenting”
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2 comments -
1. I LOVE this blog.
2. For the Gypsy, I know the owner. When that pic was taken, the foal had been out on a trail ride all day with his dam and other horses. He was quite tired and they thought it would be “cute”. She’s already been told that’s not safe by the board she posted it to. It’s a cute pic, till you think about what could have happened.
If you like barefoot riding and just plain bad horsemanship, check out this girl’s page. She lives in Australia but she trains like the Shoshone Indians…barefoot and all most of the time.
Yikes!
Oh and this page…
Thats her wild brumby filly
Wtf?! Why is her 18 month old filly being ridden? Why are her feet so god damn far in the stirrups?
Obviously there are many more things wrong with those photos – but those two were my immediate thoughts. At least she wears a helmet though.
See, this is why Aussies are thought of as red-necked cowboys.
I think it’s a great blog. I’v seen people breeding paints just “for color” and were getting those white babies, who died in 2 days (seen it 4(!) times in last year). That’s just SO HORRIBLE!
Thank you so much for posting this. I showed my friend’s these pictures–friends that seem to think running a shitty boarding stable out of their cow barn (where the horses are going to get thrush, no questions asked) makes them royalty in the horse world–and of course the first things they said were, “We sit with Trigger like that, and Lexi (4 yr old) can stand up on Robin!” I’m like no…not you too!! Please don’t start breeding otherwise the horse world is f*cked.
Thanks for taking your thoughts to the internet, hopefully more people will see this and realize how stupid they’re being.
1. I think “Oh, for F*** sake” is one of the funniest expressions ever.
2. You forgot to add that the helmetless kid with the dragging reins is on cement. Nice touch, mom.
I love this blog. I found an addition to the retarded parents category. Where do these people come from?! You have to have a license to drive a car, but any idiot can have kids. Give me a break!!
http://www.equinehits.com/horses-for-sale/horse-155641
I love this blog…
My comment is this: People then are wondering why they get hurt all the time, or their child is sent to the emergency room and such..
Here is something to talk about? People are teaching children and adults to grab the back of the saddle and horn when their horse is getting out of control..
to CupOfCakes, the filly obviously isn’t wild, though I don’t argue that being around horses in thongs (or flip flops as you might call them) is a bad idea, nor the way that she’s riding a year and a half old filly.